LESSONS IN DRIVING FOR WHITE VAN MAN

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Want to know where your tax goes to. Well it seems the government plan to give white van man lessons on how to drive. They want them to be more considerate. White hair man, Alistaire Darling (isn’t he though) said it would be good for everyone. Yes darling it will, except we don’t see how you’re going to get the white van men that need it in to the training centres. You’ll get the drivers who don’t need it without any trouble, quiet, stable older men who get on with the job and cause very little trouble. In fact men who don’t need further training. As for the others, well how are you going to convince them that their dicks aren’t an integral part of their engine. Macho men – usually small guys with pin heads and close cropped hair whose outlet for aggression is tailgating at 70 miles an hour and being faster than any other car on the road. Hey haven’t you heard, they own the road.

Well it’s a joint deal with minicab drivers and lorries. Everyone else is just an amateur with no right to be in front of them. Often they have dark glasses to make them look cool (in a white van?) yes! They think they look cool. Let them go on thinking it. It’s good for a laugh. Some have put alloy wheels on their little Escort HiTops. All wear polo shirts (obligatory) carry copies of the Sun or Mirror and constantly chew gum. Of course minicab drivers have the right not to signal, to drive in the middle of two lane highways and to ignore traffic signs. Lorry drivers of course have the right to pull out on you without consulting their mirrors when you’re about to overtake them, tailgate you on motorways and block the outside lane of a two lane highway when trying to overtake another lorry going one mile an hour slower. They also by reason of their size have no problem nearly causing an accident by bullying their bulk at you as they know they’ll always come off better, (Eddie Stobart lorries are an exception to this rule). Well good luck darling with this scheme. Sounds like tax money well spent and if it satisfies you as we know you hate white vans and have constant runins with them, then its a good thing. Right!