| MARCH 2008 | |
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Bullshit News - the best bullshit satire
and fun on the net
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BERNARD GUSSET -
AFTERTHOUGHTS (Updated... as and when)
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IN BRIEF : SORRY WE'VE BEEN OUT OF TOUCH............................................. |
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| Yes, for a while we've been.... well busy you could say. So much so that this site has been neglected. Sorry about that but there we are. Anyway for a time we are back with a few articles. However for the time being we are doing a few articles just to keep ones hand in. | |
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For
Previous
Front Page see left.
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| March 2008 | |
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FAIREST RUSSIAN ELECTION FOR DECADES
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Well what can one say. Its been a smashing election here in mother Russia and everyone is more than happy with the outcome because it was all fair and above board. Lots of people turned out for the occasion - it wasn't as if they had to threaten them to vote or anything - and what d'you know, there wasn't an oligarch in sight. Nope those that aren't locked up stayed away, and then it was all tea and crumpets and knees up mother Russia down the Kremlin afterwards. So once again Vladimir Putin was elected for a third term.... what am I saying. What I meant to say was that Dmitri Medvedev was elected as New President of Russia. After he and Mr Putin (no apparent connection) had cast their votes, the happy couple were seen dining at the local Goodfellas Bar and grill. They sat side by side at the restaurant - its hard not to when you're joined at the hip - and later they shared a cab back to their respective homes and adoring wives who for the best part stayed home to catch up on their knitting. |
| President Medevac, dressed in Mr Benn haute couture for Men has vowed publicly to follow former President Putin's policies to the letter. Big surprise there. Of course he's absolutely over the moon to be of exactly the same mind on all policies as the future Prime Minister.Such a coincidnce. What are the chances of a new president being of exactly the same mind as his predecessor. They should play the lottery. Anyway its a lucky break, and one of many breaks that the new president has avoided. One of the benefits of their close association will be that Mr Putin as Prime Minister will be able to advise Mr Medicare on all future policies as it would appear they are to have a close working relationship in the future, just him and Mr Putin and a few members of the former KGB. All nice and friendly like. We take this opportunity of wishing the happy couple all the best for their future relationship together and look forward to hearing all new policies and future developments. | |
| Feb 2008 | |
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IT'S A MAD MAD MAD "MAD HATTER'S"
TEA PARTY DOWN THE INQUEST
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Mohammed Al
Fayed, the Dell Boy of Knightsbridge had his day in court at
the Diana inquest, and it is official, he's as mad as the Mad Hatter at
the mad March Hare's madness (bring your own shrink) afternoon tea and
acid trip extravaganza. Blaming anyone and everyone who didn't subscribe
to his conspiracy theories he held court outside the court looking for
sympathetic journalism. There wasn't any to be had as it turned out. Not
being one for measured response to questioning he ran away at the mouth
as on previous occasions. His combative manner and hostile attitude towards
nearly all journalists present did him no favors. In fact he gave the
BBC corespondent Peter Hunt quite a roasting even accusing him of being
a member of MI6. "....you're a bloody idiot... a part of the establishment...
part of the conspiracy... you bloody idiot..." Given his "I-should-get-everything-I-demand" way with words, it's clear to see why he has never been given British citizenship. Humility is not and never has been his strong point. It's also fair to say that if he brands Prince Philip a "Nazi" and a "Racist", its only natural for the "establishment" is it therefore fair to assume he's a subversive and a terrorist. |
| In fact who would put it past him to be so aggrieved by what he believes, that he has indeed formed some association with a terrorist organisation. But of course that is just a conspiracy theory and not worth the paper it's written on? Meanwhile the Diana inquest circus drags on and it is safe to assume that whatever the outcome, if it decides that Diana and Dodi died accidentally, Mr Al Fayed (seen left with huge rabbit) will still insist that everybody but him is in the pay of the Palace and or secret service and that the only true version is his. Curioser and curioser. | |
